Showing posts with label loser. Show all posts
Showing posts with label loser. Show all posts

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

High School and Facebook

I had a dream about high school last night. I had to go back. Not only did i have to go back it had been about 5 years since I had graduated, others I went to school with were all there and the Jr's and Sophomores were all 5 and 6 years younger. One thing I remember was sitting on the bleachers on the west side of the football field. This was the home side. One girl who I always thought was pretty and yet nice (Josie Gay for those I went to high school with) had to do some gymnastics type thing. I don't know if she could do this in real life back then but in my dream she was struggling and I remember thinking, yeah 5 years will make us all soft. I never could do any gymnastics though. I was lucky to do a cartwheel or a somersault.
This brought back all sorts of memories this morning I thought I would share...
When I was in HS I SO wanted to be a cheerleader. Heck I wanted to be any sort of officer. I ran for office each year and never won. I could have tried out for Pep Club and probably would have made it, but I was too chicken. I wanted to be on dance company, and back then I really could dance but I was too chicken. Seriously about 10 minutes before it was my turn to try out, I went home. Just grabbed all my stuff and walked home.
My senior year I did try out for cheerleader. I made it through primaries...probably because and only because there were exactly the right amount of people trying out to make it to the finals. When we were paired up I was paired with the tallest guy. I was still one of the shorter girls but I suspect it was because I was the heaviest. Man I think back now what I thought heavy was and what I would do to weigh that little again...anyway...I didn't make it. I know that so much of this had to do with me not being able to physically do any gymnastics but I know it also had to do with popularity. I could have turned around and run for Song Leader but for some reason I decided to run for some other office and lost. My dreams of being an officer in school never happened.
My senior year I was so ticked I didn't go to anything that entire year. Not a single football game nor dance. Oh wait, I did go to homecoming, I had been asked then was stood up. I called a friend from another high school and asked him to take me since I had never been to homecoming and it was my last chance. He was cool like that.
So anyway...As some if not all of you know, I am on facebook. I have developed some awesome friendships from people from high school. I notice though, they have lots of friends on facebook from high school that I don't have. For awhile I was trying to add people I knew, but they never wrote to me or anything. I thought, maybe they really don't remember me so I stopped adding people. Since then only 2 people have asked to add me as friends.
I am wondering what people really thought in high school now. I thought I was fairly popular and well liked. That most people knew who I was. I knew who most people were and I tried to be friends but I am thinking that fewer people actually knew who I was. (This is easier to swallow than to think that people really didn't like me...and this really probably is the case.)
I realize that high school was 15 years ago and heck I don't really care what happened in my life 5 years ago let alone 15 but facebook has caused me to think about these things. I am glad I am on there because of the friendships I have from it BUT man it brings up some bad memories from time to time. I am sure glad we don't have to go back in our lives and re-live parts! That is one part I sure would skip. (I was just thinking as I tagged this of the movie Never Been Kissed. That would seriously be my biggest nightmare. I didn't get teased to my face as Josie Grosie did BUT I know people talked about me behind my back. I had one friend who actually told me some of the stuff. The point is, I sure was a lot like her in high school.)